Those Blasted Pigs
by Jadebell
Summary: Link decides he really hates pigs. For once, it has nothing to do with Ganon. Set before Wind Waker.


Originally written in November 2007, as part of a multi-chaptered fic that was never completed. I found this part again recently while searching through my hard drive, and I figured it might be nice to upload it as a one-shot.

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**Those Blasted Pigs**

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It wasn't as if Link was deliberately _trying_ to be incompetent. He was, in fact, trying his damned hardest to succeed. When Link was focused on something, he went for it a thousand and fifty per cent. No, this complete and utter failure was more due to the fact that retrieving escaped pigs was a bit on the hard side when the little buggers were squealing and squirming and biting chunks of skin off his hands every time he got close to them.

Cursing the condition of his sore hands, Link turned to glare down at the three pigs that he knew were hidden somewhere in the long grass.

"One of these days," he growled, "I'm going to roast the lot of you on a skewer! _Then_ we'll see who's biting who!"

"Don't say that!" Zill admonished, appearing beside Link with a horrified gasp. "They'll hear you!"

"Of course they'll hear me," grumbled Link, without turning round, "that's the whole point."

He wasn't surprised in the slightest at Zill's sudden appearance. Zill had an annoying habit of following Link wherever he went, even though it was clear Link wanted to be as far away from him as he could get on a small island. With Zill, what worried Link wasn't that he always had a long, disgusting string of snot hanging from his nose. What worried Link was that Zill didn't seem to _care_ that he always had a long, disgusting string of snot hanging from his nose. It certainly wasn't something Link wanted to be a part of, which was why every time he saw him, he made polite excuses about places he needed to be and made a break for it.

Fortunately, this time he really _did_ have somewhere he needed to be. Yelling, "Gottagonow-orcasexpectingme-seeyoulater!" to the wind, he ran swiftly from the area of tall grass, onto a path, and kept going, leaping across stones, over water, until he was sure Zill was out of sight. Though he slowed his run, he was tempted to run flat out to Orca's house – just to be on the safe side. But the sight of a new person in front of him, one he hadn't expected, made him stop in his tracks. It was Abe, owner of the pigs – and Zill's dad.

"Oh, _no_!" Abe wailed, and Link inwardly groaned. So much for a quick getaway from the murderous pigs. "Don't tell me you're giving up already?"

Abe sounded so distraught it was as if he thought the island would sink to the bottom of the ocean (and all manner of other terrible things would happen) if Link quit his daily pig-catching.

"Sorry," Link said, grinning sheepishly in embarrassment as he caught his breath. "I couldn't get any of them. They keep running away. I really gave it my all today, too, but I guess they're just too smart for me."

Abe clapped a hearty hand on Link's shoulder. "Don't be disheartened, m' boy," he said, in what he must have thought was a reassuring voice. It wasn't. Link could tell that the words of encouragement were all pretence. "I'm sure you'll do better if you just keep at it."

"I'd love to keep trying," Link lied, hoping _his_ smile didn't look too false, "but I have to do swords training with Orca in five minutes."

"_Ah_," said Abe, looking a bit put out. "Crud, I'd forgotten… Well. Never mind." Link knew he was disappointed, not because he was dissatisfied with Link's abysmal performance but because he'd have to catch the aggressive little terrors himself.

"Good luck," Link told him, smiling for real now.

"Yeah. Thanks," Abe replied, without any kind of enthusiasm. "Same to you." He walked along the path that would lead back towards his house, looking as if he'd just been given the death sentence.

Link chuckled to himself. It was actually quite usual for him to do odd jobs around the village. He was more than happy to help out where he could; it was a great way to earn rupees, and it kept him busy when he wasn't training with Orca, or studying with Sturgeon (Orca's older brother). His tasks ranged from carrying fresh water from the spring to the village, to assisting the fishermen with their catches. He helped his grandmother with household chores, and sometimes, when the Rito postman arrived at the post box with letters, Link would deliver them personally to each house.

In short, Link was no stranger to hard work. But – _really_. Those pigs were just too much. It was Abe's fault for buying them, and it was Abe who should have been the one to deal with them every time they escaped.

_Next time,_ he thought. _Next time I'll just say no._

He also remembered thinking the same thing yesterday, and the day before, and the day before that.

_Blasted pigs._


End file.
